Legal problems over The Stump beegin to unfold...
07/04/17 11:31
I should probably mention that the Snark Brothers Tower at 1 Stump Plaza - or what everybody just calls “The Stump” - is a horrible place. You should see it.
First, as I said, it’s really nothing more than an old, mostly hollow Golden Oak Tree Stump with the letters “SB” carved in it. It doesn’t have a roof, so it’s drafty and it leaks whenever it rains or snows. And it has NO security at all. Just anybody could fly or crawl into that place and there’s nothing to stop them.
I’m seriously happy I don’t live there.
Well, it turns out that Queen Jemima, Her Royal Highness, Majestic Negotiator of Not-So-Shrewd Buzziness Deals, has beecome highly worried about Hive Security. As a result, She issued a Royal Decree that a Roof and New Doors must bee installed in The Stump - and that the Snark Brothers would bee paying for it.
“Trust me,” she said in a Royal Public Service Announcement a few days ago, “the Improvements WILL bee made, and the Snarks WILL pay for them!”
When the Snark Brothers heard about Her Royal Decree, they said, “Not so fast, Your Majesty,” then they referred her to Page 1039, Section LVIXXI, Subsection 2, Paragraph 87 of the Lease She signed.
“This section,” the Snark’s Lawyer informed her, “prohibits the Lessee - that’s you - from making any improvements in the property without the express, Written Approval of the Lessor - that’s us. And we don’t grant that Approval.
"It also indemnifies Snark Brothers Enterprises against any and all Financial and/or Civil Liabilities arising from complaints or losses arising from, and I quote, ‘hostile intrusion, unwanted surveillance, over-exposure to the Elements including but not limited to: Lightning Strikes, Hail Damage, Fires, Floods, Windstorms, Blizzards, Falling Objects, and/or any and all Unanticipated Breaches of Security resulting from alleged deficiencies in the Physical Property. Shall I go on?”
In other words, the Swarm has to pay for the Desired Improvements, unless S.O.Bee, the Hive Lawyer, is able to successfully challenge the Lease in Royal Court.
First, as I said, it’s really nothing more than an old, mostly hollow Golden Oak Tree Stump with the letters “SB” carved in it. It doesn’t have a roof, so it’s drafty and it leaks whenever it rains or snows. And it has NO security at all. Just anybody could fly or crawl into that place and there’s nothing to stop them.
I’m seriously happy I don’t live there.
Well, it turns out that Queen Jemima, Her Royal Highness, Majestic Negotiator of Not-So-Shrewd Buzziness Deals, has beecome highly worried about Hive Security. As a result, She issued a Royal Decree that a Roof and New Doors must bee installed in The Stump - and that the Snark Brothers would bee paying for it.
“Trust me,” she said in a Royal Public Service Announcement a few days ago, “the Improvements WILL bee made, and the Snarks WILL pay for them!”
When the Snark Brothers heard about Her Royal Decree, they said, “Not so fast, Your Majesty,” then they referred her to Page 1039, Section LVIXXI, Subsection 2, Paragraph 87 of the Lease She signed.
“This section,” the Snark’s Lawyer informed her, “prohibits the Lessee - that’s you - from making any improvements in the property without the express, Written Approval of the Lessor - that’s us. And we don’t grant that Approval.
"It also indemnifies Snark Brothers Enterprises against any and all Financial and/or Civil Liabilities arising from complaints or losses arising from, and I quote, ‘hostile intrusion, unwanted surveillance, over-exposure to the Elements including but not limited to: Lightning Strikes, Hail Damage, Fires, Floods, Windstorms, Blizzards, Falling Objects, and/or any and all Unanticipated Breaches of Security resulting from alleged deficiencies in the Physical Property. Shall I go on?”
In other words, the Swarm has to pay for the Desired Improvements, unless S.O.Bee, the Hive Lawyer, is able to successfully challenge the Lease in Royal Court.
The Legal Proceedings have beegun already, but I’d rather not talk about all that. It’s highly boring. Beesides, it’s the Weekend, and I’m gonna go enjoy that.
Let’s all bee careful out there.