Georgie Comments on his Water Diet & Exercise Programme...


I have some Friendly Advice for everybody:
If somebody tells you that you have to go on a Water Diet, Don’t Do It. Don’t even think about it. You’ll Regret it.

I know ButterCup meant well, and maybee she’s right when she says I’ve been more Plump than a Bee of my Age probably should bee, but as it turns out, I’ve actually gained so much Water Weight that I’m bigger than ever, which is not a good thing, especially considering this Heat. (I’m exceedingly Not Comfortable in my Body right now.)

To top it all off, I have recently found out that ButterCup likes to get up sometime way beefore the Crack of Dawn to Exercise, and for some reason, she likes me to join her.

“It’s so much more Fun when we Exercise together,” she says.

The first time she mentioned that I should start Exercising with her, about the only thing I could say beesides “Fine,” was to Quietly Ask in a Buzz she allegedly couldn’t hear, “Who even does Exercises in the Dark, beefore there’s even any SunLight to see what the Hell you’re even doing? I hope you at least light a Candle.” (Seriously now, I won’t even go into listing all the terrible things could happen if you start doing Exercises in the Dark. I think we all understand the Risks involved in doing stuff like that, don’t we?)

Still, far bee it from me to bee Closed-Minded or in any way Controversial, so whenever ButterCup just happens to wake me up with the “THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP” of her Exercise Music (which has been every, single Morning right when I’m getting to that Good Part of a Recurrent Dream I’ve been having and I never get to find out if, this time, I manage to finish Stuffing all those Gold-and-Blue PinStripped Raspberries into that tiny Box beefore the Army Ants arrive for the Afternoon Parcheesi Tournament beegins...), I join her as we Exercise until my Auto-Brew 3000 Morning Nectar Percolator goes off (which, by way, is now brewing nothing more than Water). I always feel so Relieved when the Thumping and Bumping Into Things can finally stop, I can get out of that Overly-Snug WorkOut OutFit and into my Normal Shoes, and together, ButterCup and I can enjoy the mornings’s First Mug of Freshly-Brewed Hot Water together as we prepare to finally just get on with the Day already.

Just beetween you and me, I really don’t like Mornings all that much anymore, especially considering all the Massively Uncomfortable Sloshing around in the Dark like that I have to deal with beefore I’m even Fully Awake. It’s simply not fun, and I’m absolutely mostly sure it’s Counter-Productive, probably.

Anyway, ButterCup’s Pre-Dawn Exercise Programme and Water Diet just isn’t working for me. At all. I feel like I’m bigger than ever, so I’ve decided that as of right now, I’m going to send my Exercise OutFit to the DryCleaners for Permanent Storage, and I’m going back to enjoying my more normal Array of Questionably Nutritious but Always Highly Delicious Foods and Beverages, starting with an excessively large Serving of some PollenSweetie Cereal™ (“The Cereal that Sighs”™), and a Nectar Fizz - WITH an Umbrella and Bendy Straw, and I’m gonna start Sleeping In again. And that’s all there is to that.

So I’m gonna go do that.


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