Another meeting with Georgie's Editor...

So it’s really chilly and windy out today. I hafta say that the very last thing I wanted to hafta do this morning was to get out of bed and go out, but I had to. I had no choice, as usual. At least I managed to find my Antennae Cozies so I could make it to my Editor’s Office this morning without having my Antennae freeze and snap off. (That would hurt. A lot.) I was still trying to warm up my Wings when I walked in and noticed he was standing there beehind his Desk, glaring at me.

“This isn’t working, bee,” he said. “We’re getting complaints. Again. And that,” he said, “is unacceptable.”

“Complaints?” I had to ask. “About what?”

“About your over-use of ‘Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™’ in your Observations, that’s what.” He sounded upset.

“I don’t get it,” I told him, “you told me that every time I made an Observation, I had to mention Great Grandma Gee’s Royal Honey... ™,” except that I didn’t get to get to even saying the “Trademark” part beefore he interrupted me.

“Never mind what I said, bee,” he buzzed at me. “Our Beeloved Readers are beecoming highly annoyed.”

“Annoyed?” I asked. “But you said...”

“Are your Antenna frozen, bee? Did you not hear what I just said to you? Forget what I said, and listen to me,” he said, though at that point I was a bit confused about what I wasn’t supposed to bee listening to anymore, especially if he said it. But he kept talking anyway.

“This Office has received stacks and stacks of complaints about this matter.” Then he pointed his Wing at his Desk at what looked like a pile of MAYBEE two or three hostile-looking Buzz•O•Grams™, if that, and said, “You see these? These are Complaints from Beeloved Readers who are highly annoyed at your amazingly rude and redundant references to Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™. When our Beeloved Readers beecome annoyed, we have to Un-Annoy them. YOU have to Un-Annoy them.”

“But, you told me I had to mention Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal...”

Georgie-with-his-Editor_4


“You’re still not hearing me, bee,” he said, sticking his pointed Wing in my face. “FIX THIS -
OR ELSE.
Now get out of my Office.” So I did that.

Oh geeeeeeze. How in the hell am I supposed to meet my Legal Obligation to mention Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™ in every one of my Observations without mentioning Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™? I wanna know. I mean, I don’t wanna annoy my Beeloved Readers, but I also don’t wanna make Great Grandma Gee Gee mad. Seriously. That would not bee a good thing.

I gotta figure out what to do about all this, but I’m absolutely, totally sure I’ll come up with something, probably. So I’m gonna go do that.

Let’s all bee highly careful out there.

GeorgieBee Signature

Observation #29: Stuff Breaking

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29

Has anyone else every noticed that, just about the time you think you’ve got everything fixed, and you can maybee relax for a half a second, then something else breaks?

Geeeeeeeze. What is that? It’s like a conspiracy sometimes or something.

As you know, I was trying to find a Replacement Filter Bracket for my Drip’N’Munch Model 32-A Combination DeLuxe Pollen Roaster and Nectar Dispenser (mine is a cheerful Mid-Early Warm Season Our Lady of Guadalupe Bluey-Green, so of course, I had to get a Bracket to match), and was having no luck whatsoever. So finally, I just had to seek out the only source I knew could get it for me which, unfortunately, was Felonie Snark (she’s my Illegitimate Nephew, Kevin’s, Previously-and-Still-Sometimes Estranged Sister…or is it Stepsister? I don’t remember).

Anyway, after promising to Secretly Deliver 187 cases of Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™…and by the way, beecause I forgot to mention it last time (and my Editor was very upset), I hafta say this beefore I go on . . .

Do you wake up in the middle of the night, craving a Nibble?
There’s no better Nibble to turn to than
Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™.

Baked fresh every day using the healthiest and most delicious natural ingredients,
Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™ can’t bee beat. So buzz out right now and pick up a good supply of Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™ - and don’t bee caught Nibble-less!

This has been a Sponsored Message from Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies

Okay, where was I? Oh yeah.

So I had to set up this Clandestine Cookie Smuggling Deal just to get my Bracket from the Snarks, and nobody could know about it - or Else (that came from Narville Snark, who is Felonie’s Alleged Father). So I did that, mostly (Okay, don’t tell anybody, but I only Secretly Delivered 186 Cases, but fair’s fair, right? It’s a Delivery Charge. Everybody charges for that, right? Beesides, I’m absolutely, reasonably positive for the most part that the Snarks won’t miss that one, tiny, little Case at all.)

Well NOW, after I put on the new Bracket, the rest of my Drip’N’Munch stopped working completely. It doesn’t even light up anymore, which was one of the best parts of that thing, probably. That means I’m not only gonna hafta get a new one (and the new ones are NEVER as good as the old ones) - but I still got stuck with that whole Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookie™ Fiasco.

Seriously now.

Speaking of which, I think I’m gonna go get some of those.
I feel incredibly hungry.

Let’s all bee highly careful out there!

GeorgieBee Signature

Observation #28: Informational Discrepancies

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28




I’m sure it’s just me, but I just noticed something that doesn’t make a lot of sense.

Earlier today, I was sitting in the Kitchen in my Shoe Box, enjoying a third Acorn Capful of my favourite Morning Nectar (it’s kind of a blend of Honeysuckle and more earthy Hollyhock Nectars - it’s highly delicious) when I beegan to wonder if it might bee warm enough outside to maybee go into town to see if anybody’s dropped any ice cream lately or something - you know, bee outside.

To find out for sure, I decided to check that “Weather Or Not” App on my Device for today’s Forecast. I was absolutely positive that it would bee completely and utterly accurate, mostly, and that whatever it said, I could beelieve.

Well, first, the App told me that it was raining outside and that there was no Wind. That was wrong. It’s clear and sunny, and there’s a 32 mph Wind blowing (with gusts up to 87 mph).

Then it said that we had a Humidity Reading of 38%, when I know for a fact that the Humidity is closer to beeing somewhere beetween 41.2% and 42.1% (I know, beecause I’m highly sensitive to Humidity Levels). So that was also wrong.

So I checked the Current Temperature Measurement and Hourly Beeforecast. Does the beeing who is responsible for writing this stuff even read their own material? Seriously now.

For the Up-to-the-Rounded-Up Second Weather Reading, it said it was a balmy 282.039 Kelvins (or to you, I suppose that’d bee about 48º Fair in Height, or - as a lot of European Honeybees would say - about 8.88889º ShallSeeUs). Okay fine. That’s not bad. I actually prefer it to bee OVER 283.15 Kelvins beefore I go out, but maybee, I thought, it might get that warm out today. But I needed to bee sure, so I checked the BeeforeCast Temperature. Get this: THAT said that the High Temperature for today was gonna bee 278.706 Kelvins. Already they were wrong. But at least it said it was gonna stop raining (which it wasn’t already), so that was good, probably. Still, a bee could almost freeze in those kind of temperatures. There’s no room for Guesswork with this stuff, ya’ know? It’s just too risky.

I thought about getting dressed and buzzing over to my old Boot Box to ask Bert (my Illegitimate Nephew, Kevin’s, iBee Robot) what his Recorded Weather Data and Possible Predictions might bee (he’s highly accurate), but since I didn’t know what it was like out, I wasn’t about to take the chance of not dressing properly. Also, going out in this kind of Wind could bee dangerous. I just won’t take those kinds of chances. It just isn’t worth it, usually.

Anyway, by the time I finished trying to find out what it’s gonna bee like out today, weather-wise, I was so confused by all the Informational Discrepancies in Weather Reporting, that I just decided to stay inside and Binge-Watch the First Season of “Bee Box”. I’ve heard that’s really great.

So I’m gonna go do that.

Let’s all bee highly careful out there.

GeorgieBee Signature

Observation #27: Rude Commercial Interruptions

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27



I hafta tell you about something I noticed the other day. Actually, it was first mentioned by my Girlfriend, ButterCup - she and I had lunch together the other day when she was on break from her job in the Hive's Redundant Typing Pool. (She hates her job.) Anyway, during lunch, she was watching something on her BeeNet-Connected Device when she suddenly slammed it down and said, “Enough!”

“What?” I asked - you know, beecause I knew ButterCup wanted me to ask.
She's like that.

“I’ve been trying to watch this Video online for about a month now, but I can’t ever see the end. There are too many Rude Commercial Interruptions. I give up. Try it for yourself, if you don’t beelieve me,” she said. Then she slipped her Device into my Wing, finished her Pollen Salad, and left.

So I decided to try to watch an Online Video to see if I had the same Problem. After scrolling around for awhile, I started watching a short Video online about Amazing Collisions beetween Worker Bees in Russia (there were some really bad ones), when all of a sudden, the video just STOPPED right at the best part, and this thing popped up saying, “Your Video will continue after this AD, probably.”

For the next 87 seconds, I had to sit there and watch some stupid AD for these highly cool, technologically advanced LED Antennae Cozies. Oh sure, they’re an amazing Innovation - who wouldn’t want Antennae Cozies that you can change colours, or make them flash when you flying around in the dark? But that’s really not the point, is it? I mean, I wanted to watch the Video. But no. First I had to watch the AD.

After the AD finally ended, I decided to read an Article that went with the Collision Video (how it was Produced, how many bees died in the making of the Video, etc.) when this big, grey box with an “X” in the corner suddenly showed up, blocking the entire Article. It said, “Are you enjoying this Article? Subscribe to our Web Site today and, for only 3 pounds of Honey a month, we’ll deliver Articles into your Inbox!” Seriously? I hadn’t even gotten through the first paragraph of that Article. How would I know if I liked it or not? I’ll tell you: I wouldn’t. And what kind of Articles? About what? I wanted to know, and they weren't tell me. Geeeeze.

Okay, so I figured if I clicked my Wing on the “X”, the box would go away. After clicking about 19 times, it did. So I went back to reading the Article.

Guess what happened after that? Beelieve it or not, I discovered there were ADS beetween every, single Sentence in the Article. Can you even beelieve that? And what was up and down both sides of the Page? More ADS.

The Observation I hafta make about all this is: Don't you think it’s about time we didn’t all hafta put up with all these Rude Commercial Interruptions? I do. It’s highly unacceptable and it really has to stop. It’s Rude.

By the way, beefore I continue, I hafta pause just for a second here (it’s a contractual thing) - and share this with everybody:

Do you wake up in the middle of the night, craving a Nibble?
There’s no better Nibble to turn to than
Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™.

Baked fresh every day using the healthiest and most delicious natural ingredients,
Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™ can’t bee beat. So buzz out right now and pick up a good supply of Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies™ - and don’t bee caught Nibble-less!

This has been a Sponsored Message from Great Grandma Gee Gee’s Royal HoneyChew Krisp Cookies

So where was I? Oh yeah. I was buzzing about Bee Collision Videos.

I think I’m gonna go watch some more of those.

Let’s all bee highly careful out there.

GeorgieBee Signature

excuse me . . .

Okay. Hold on everybody. I’ve been highly buzzy, but my next Observation (#27 - Rude Commercial Interruptions) is almost ready to go, mostly, so stay tuned.

In the meantime, can somebody tell me where I can find a Replacement Filter Bracket for a Drip’N’Munch Model 32-A Combination DeLuxe Pollen Roaster and Nectar Dispenser? I went to Bees R’ Us to find one, but they told me, “They still make those?” And I can’t see to find it online anywhere. Geeeeeze. Somebody told me that Felonie Snark, my Illegitimate Nephew, Kevin’s, Formerly Estranged Sister, might know a bee who might know a bee who knows where to find one, but I’m not sure if I really want to go there, if ya’ know what I mean.

Still, I need really that bracket, but I just thought I’d ask you first.
Lemme know. Okay then.