I'm so Excited!  Not only is today the First Day of the New Hot Season (Happy First Day of the New Hot Season, by the way), but it's also the Day that I am about to Submit my very First "Georgie's Eye From the Ground Looking Up Uncannily Accurate SkyCast Weather Report" for publication in today’s Up-to-the-Minute Issue of the Bee Times Gazette Journal Record ... and Online News! (If you’re not a Subscriber, you should bee. Not only will you bee able to Enjoy my Overly-Dependable Weather Forecasts, but you can get all kinds of great Discount Coupons to use with Local Merchants, such as the one I have for Half-Off Half a Lunch at Lousy Louies, Festive Beverages Not Included, which I intend to use as soon as I get off of Work today.)

Now, as you might Recall, I was given that Weather Prediction Device, the very latest in Meteorological Predictive Tools - the Fully-Adjustable, Lightweight and Portable SBE X-56 MeteorMan 1000 with Optional Real-Time Interactive Humidity Gauge and Breeze Detector, but I Accidentally left it Outside my ShoeBox after the first time I tried to use it, and somebody (I don't know Who) came along in the Middle of the Night and Stole the thing. I mean seriously now - what the hell is it with all these Middle of the Night Thefts? And does anybody by any chance know where I can find a replacement for a Fully-Adjustable, Lightweight and Portable SBE X-56 MeteorMan 1000 with Optional Real-Time Interactive Humidity Gauge and Breeze Detector? I need to find one.

Anyway, after Careful Consideration, and noticing how Mostly Wrong the Weather Forecasters on the Bee Network ("Bees, all Bees, 26 hours a Day") seem to bee, I figured if I just go Outside and look Up, I'll bee able to make a totally Accurate Weather Forecast with no Problem Whatsoever. So that's what I've been doing today.

Of course, when I mentioned my Intentions to my Sensory-Impaired, Certified Emotional Support/Service LadyBug, Potato, she said,  "Well, Georgie, if you're planning to go Outside, I'd bring an Umbrella, if I were you. I believe it's going to rain...the stubs where my Antennae used to bee are aching, and that's a Sure Sign of a Low Pressure Front. That can often mean Bad Storms, you know,” she said. Whatever.

I wasn't sure if I beelieved Potato, beecause just beefore she started talking about Umbrellas, I had looked out my ShoeBox’s Front Window and, from what I could see, it was a Perfectly Clear, Dry, Sunny-to-Partly-Cloudy Day Outside, so why would I need an Umbrella?  I wouldn't.  Just the same, beefore I stepped Outside to Assess the Current Real-Time Up-to-Date On-the-Spot Weather Conditions, I took an Umbrella with me, just to Humour Potato. (In case you never met her, Potato can bee Highly Defensive about her Opinions at times, especially when she's Wrong. I blame her Upbringing.) And, of course, Potato has insisted that she Join me. ("It's Important," she said, "that I Remain by your Side to the Greatest Extent Possible.  It's for your own Safety," she said. 
"Fine," I said.)

Anyway, as I've stepped outside, I've been looking out from under my Umbrella, and all I can see are Clear, Sunny-to-Partly-Puffy-Cloudy Skies, and Temperatures which make you want to just Lie Around in a nice, quiet Shady Spot and do a lot of Nothing instead of having to Work all day going Flower-to-Flower, collecting pollen for the Hive as the Queen keeps telling everybody they have to do all the time until they Die.  Geeeeeze. What kind of Life is That on a Nice Day? 

By the way, I just found out that the Hive has a New Queen, Her Insufferably Royal Majesty, Queen Tay. Her Official Coronation was last Tuesday,  I think. About all I've heard about her is that she likes to Buzz in the Shower, and pays the Hive's Workers really well, which is a good thing.

Okay, so even though it does seem Weirdly Noisey around here today, I should get back to the Task of completing my Astute Meteorological Observations and Submit my Uncannily Accurate Forecast to my Editor.  I'm sure he's going to bee beeyond Pleased.

So I'm gonna go do that. 
So maybee you've probably for sure heard me mention that my Editor has Anger Management Issues, right? Well, apparently, he hasn't been going to the Meetings, so when he told me I had to show up in his Office - Or Else - I was mostly completely sure that he was going to Yell at me about something, and I was right. He did that.

Just to make a Short Story slightly Longer, I'm sure we all remember that my Editor had decided that I should bee the one to do the Daily Weather Forecasts for the Hive Newspaper (the Bee Times Gazette Journal Record...and Online News), and that to help me do a Job I never wanted, he had Purchased the Latest in Meteorological Predictive Tools - the Fully-Adjustable, Lightweight and Portable SBE X-56 MeteorMan1000 with Optional Real-Time Interactive Humidity Gauge and Breeze Detector which was, unfortunately, Lost in an Unexpected and Highly Severe Thunderstorm that Nobody saw coming, especially me. (It's the same Storm that Significantly Damaged my ShoeBox ... it was lucky that both Potato (my Certified Sensory-Impaired Emotional Support/Service LadyBug) and I were outside, enjoying the Beeautiful Weather. 

When my Editor found out that the Device had been Destroyed in the Storm, he told me that I'd have to not only pay 1/2 a Pound of Honey out of my Meagre Weekly Wages every week for the Loss of the Device (I only get 1/2-pound of Honey a Week .. that's not even enough to buy an order of Honey-Glazed Pollen Puffs and a Nectartini during Slightly Amused Hour at Lousy Louie's), but that I also have to provide the Weather Forecasts without the Benefit of the Device which, by the way, I never figured out  how to Use before it was Sucked Up and Carried Away by that Terrible Storm nobody saw coming.   

Seriously now, What the hell do I know about Predicting the Weather?  Nothing, that's What.

"Look," I told him, "I'm not a Weather Bee and I know Nothing about Predicting the Weather."
"It's Simple Meterology," he said.
"I also don't know anything about Simple Meteors," I told him, "and beesides, what do Simple Meteors have to do with any of this?" I had to know.
"No, Bee," he said. "this isn't about Meteors at all. It's about you providing this Publication Reliable, Accurate Daily Weather Forecasts for our Beeloved Subscribers - something you continue to Fail to Do."
"I really don’t want this Job," I told him. 
"Did I ask you if you wanted this Job, Bee?" he asked me.
"I don't think so," I said, beecause I actually couldn't remember how I ended up having this Job.
"No, I didn't," he said, which made me feel better about not remembering something I might have failed to Recall but didn’t.
“So here's what's going to Happen," he said. "I'm sending you to the Hive Library, where the Chief Librarian, Melodie Hausenfliffer, will Direct you to the Necessary Reference Materials relating to the Alleged Science of Meteorology, and you will remain in the Library until you learn how to do your Job."
"But I don't want the Job," I told him again.
"I wasn't asking," he said. "Now get out of my Office."
"Fine," I said, then I did that.

As you probably Guessed, I mentioned all of this to Kevin, my Illegitimate Nephew, and he said, “Uncle Georgie, I think you're the best Uncle in the World, and I love you, but you're not Thinking This Through."
"What are you talking about?" I had to know.
"You do not have to learn anything about Meteorology or Predicting the Weather, Uncle," he said.
"I don't?" I asked.
"No. Not anymore. I am delighted to Inform you that you can now use Fi to create your Forecasts for you."
"Fi? I asked. "What the hell is Fi?"
"Fabricated intelligence, Uncle - Upper Case F, Lower Case i - It is the latest in Technological Advancements that promises to make our Frequently-Tortured Existence more Bearable by dealing with the otherwise Monotonous and Routine Tasks that clutter what could bee a more Leisurely and Uncomplicated Lifestyle that so many of us seek. I think you should give it a try."
“Whatever,” I said.

Then Kevin gave me a Pamphlet with an Online Address and told me I needed to “Log On and bee part of the Future" with Fabricated intelligence. 

So I'm gonna do that.