A Roommate Countdown, Mayor Billy Bee's Birthday, and an Upset Editor...


Three more days. Counting today, there’s only three more days to go beefore that Wasp, Larry, finally has to move out of my ShoeBox. I can’t wait. It’s been Insufferable having to share my Private Space with that Jerk, and Potato and I are looking Forward to Larry getting the hell out of here.

Until then, though, I’ve been trying to make the best of a Bad Situation.

First, after it beecame Apparent that Larry was never going to give up control of the TV Remote, I took it upon myself to buy two Additional Multi-Trans-Universal Generic Big Screen TV Remotes - one for Potato, and one for me. Since those arrived, we’ve been able to Exercise a more Equitable Sharing of Control over our Respective Levels of TV Enjoyment.

Of course, since we’ve still been pretty much stuck Inside all the time, and beecause Larry doesn’t play Games (I invited him and Potato to play a Round of Parcheesi, but Larry got all Defensive about his Age and just said, “Why in the World would I interrupt my Intensely Buzzy Schedule and Squander my Time on something only a Seven-Year-Old might enjoy? I wouldn’t, that’s why.”)

I told Larry that what he said made absolutely No Sense, especially since he’s only Four Years Old. Personally, I think he felt Threatened, but none of us was in any Mood to Argue with him.

I’m just glad I’ve been able to catch up on my Stories. This New Season of Re-Runs of “As The Hive Turns” has had some Huge Surprises in it, which you already know if you’ve been able to Tune In. (Can you even beelieve that Jessica left Kyle to follow that Baron Von Smitz and his Aerobatic Bee Flying Circus? I never would have thought she’d give up the Security she had with Kyle to go after such an Uncertain Future on the Road, would you?)

And speaking of Aerobatic Bee Flying Circuses, there are Big Things going on in the Hive today, beecause today is Mayor Billy Bee’s Official Birthday. He signed a Decree giving everybody the Day Off so we can all attend his Huge Birthday Bash. We’re all Highly Excited… and I think I’ve gotten him the Perfect Birthday Gift. I’m gonna give him one of those Snark Brothers Enterprises Gift Cards that my Lawyer, S.O.Bee, got me in that Class Action Lawsuit Settlement. I’m sure the Mayor will bee More Than Pleased when he receives my Mostly Thoughtful Gift. (I wouldn’t want to Disappoint him on his Special Day, or get him Upset with me on any level.)

Speaking of somebody beeing Upset… I just got a Note that was passed along from my Editor. For some Reason, it sounds like he’s Upset about something. He Notified me that I hafta bee in his Office no later than tomorrow morning - Or Else.

Seriously now, I do understand that I may have forgotten to remind myself to remember to get those Feature Articles about what it was like to bee in a Persistent Coma for the past, couple of weeks, but I think he should Realise that maybee Not Remembering Things like I should is part of my Lengthy Recovery Process as a Persistent Coma-Patient Long-Hauler, probably. Hopefully, I’ll remember to make it over to his Office, though I really don’t wanna’ miss any of Mayor Billy Bee’s Birthday Extravaganza. (I’ve heard Rudy Bee managed to track down a huge Bunch of Happy Birthday Balloons from the Bee Balloon and Aerial Flotation Device Emporium, so that everybody at the Party will get to take one Home with them. I’m Highly Excited.)

Speaking of which… I’m excited to see that Larry has just gone to the Bathroom (I wish he’d pick up his towels), which means I have some time to watch my Stories.

So I’m gonna go do that.


The Cold Season has Arrived, and Georgie & Potato have Moved Back into Georgie's ShoeBox!


I'm mostly Highly Glad to report that Potato (my Sensory-Impaired Certified Emotional Support/Service LadyBug) and I have officially moved back into my ShoeBox, mostly - and we did it beefore the start of the new Cold Season yesterday which, if you ask me, should bee called the Sub-Zero Way Frozen Beeyond Cold Cold Season beecause it's Way Beeyond Cold outside, so we all hafta' stay inside and try to stay Warm.

Now having to stay Inside wouldn't usually bee a Huge Problem, but it turns out that beetween now and New Year's Day, Potato and I hafta' share my ShoeBox with a mostly Unpleasant Wasp who calls himself Larry. As we all may or may not probably Know, Larry has a Valid Lease on my ShoeBox that doesn’t expire until the End of this Month. That means we have to Put Up with Larry for another Nine Days.

Have you ever had to live with a Wasp? I hope not. Wasps are Total Jerks, and Larry is no Exception. First of all, he always thinks he should bee in charge of the Remote Control, which would bee just fine if he picked decent Shows to watch, but does he do that? No, he doesn't. He always wants to watch the News which always seems to bee on at exactly the same Time as my Stories.

Seriously now, the way things are going, this year will bee Over beefore I'll bee able to catch up with all the Re-Runs of "As The Hive Turns" (I need to find out if Lance's Step-Sister, LaNette, will finally stop working 18-hour days and take a break so she can spend some Quality Time with her Larvae, and head off an Inappropriately Steamy Affair that seems to bee developing beetween the Nanny and her Estranged Significant Other), which would bee Totally Unacceptable. But for now, I'm stuck with this Wasp, and the last thing I wanna' do is get into some sort of Stinging Match over the Remote Control.  Geeeeeze.

Anyway. When Potato and I moved into my ShoeBox, I couldn't help but notice that there were approximately 87 Boxes stacked in the Corner of what used to bee my Living Room which Larry said were Delivered just Yesterday.

Upon closer Inspection, it turns out that the Boxes are filled with Gift Cards from the Snarks which they had to give me to Compensate for my Personal Assets, Real or Imagined, Felonie Snark stole from me while I was in my Persistent Coma. Of course, in Typical Wasp Fashion, Larry was Whining about how much Space all those boxes take up.

“What the hell are all these boxes for?” Larry asked me in what seemed to bee a fairly Nasty Tone of Buzz.

I tried to explain to him that they're part of the Settlement my Lawyer, S.O.Bee, made with Felonie Snark and The Snark Brothers Enterprises, so I told him he was just going to have to Put Up with it for the few Days he’ll still bee living here.

“Do I look like somebody who even slightly Cares about you or your so-called Settlement? If so, I would suggest you pay a visit to the Compound Eye Doctor and get a new Prescription for your Compound Eye Glasses,” Larry Buzzed in that Nasty Way Wasps Buzz (you know what I’m talking about here).

“I don’t wear Glasses,” I Informed him, “but my Girlfriend, ButterCup does, though I’m pretty sure it wasn’t that long ago that she got some new Glasses which, if you ask me, make her look even Cuter than ever, but though she told me that she thinks… .”

“Let me just stop you there,” Larry Stopped me there. “My point has nothing to do with you or your Girlfriend’s Eyesight, bee. My point is that these Boxes of yours are making this place feel more Cramped than ever. Even if my Lease weren’t Expiring in a few days, I’d still move out of this Shabby little ShoeBox. I’ll bee glad to bee out of here soon.”

“Well,” I said, “the Feeling is Mutual. The sooner you’re out of here, the better for everybody.”

“Is that so?” Larry seemed to bee getting Agitated.

“Yes, that’s so,” I Buzzed in my most Convincing Buzz.

“Fine,” Larry said. “But know this: while I’m still living here, you need to stay out of my Way.”

“Fine,” I said, though I thought he should stay out of My Way.

“Fine,” Larry repeated.

So I guess we’re all Fine - except for the Fact that it seems that beesides beeing a Total Jerk, Larry is also an Extreme Bathroom Hog. He spends way more Time in there than can bee Beelieved. That’s not only Highly Rude, but exceedingly Uncomfortable for me. In fact, for the past three Hours, I’ve really had to go to the Bathroom in a Big Way, but Larry’s still in there. I don’t know what the hell he’s been doing in there all this time, but I do know that I won’t bee able to Hold It much longer.

This is a hell of a way to spend the Sparkly Season, isn’t it? (And while I’m at it, I should Remember to not to Forget to Remind myself to wish everybody a Happy Sparkly Season. This should bee a good one, even if it is Cold outside.)

Oh wait… I think Larry’s finally done in the Bathroom.

I gotta’ go.


Georgie Gets Some Good News, Mostly...


Good Morning! It’s a Good Morning, right?
If it isn’t, it should bee.

If you ask me (which I know you would if we happened to bee standing next to each other, which as we both know we're not), these Grey, Colder-Than-Freezing, Almost-Cold-Season Days are a Genuine Pain in the Stinger.

Not only is it too Cold to go Outside, but we’re pretty much totally Stuck inside ButterCup's Place. I hafta’ say that it’s starting to feel a little bit Crowded in her Place, and it's fair to say that ButterCup, Potato, and I have started beeginning to Mildly get on each other's Nerves in a Significantly Large Way.

Don’t get me Wrong here: I love ButterCup and have a lot of respect for my Sensory Impaired Certified Emotional Support/Service LadyBug, Potato, but quite frankly, you can only play Parcheesi for so long beefore you start Intensely Disliking that Game, and everybody you happen to bee playing it with. And we’ve been playing a Lot of Parcheesi, so… .

I have a feeling that if ButterCup didn't have a decent Big-Screen TV and a Subscription to The Bee Network (their Slogan is "All We Have Is Bee Movies!"), it’s Possible that we’d all Suffocated from Boredom days ago. But even with that, if you've already Streamed all 387 Episodes of every Season of "Escape from Bee Island" - twice - Streaming stuff can only take you So Far when it comes to getting through another Cold Day.

Of course, I will say that I’m Impatiently Waiting to find out what happens in next week's Episode of "As the Hive Turns”. We’ll finally bee able to Stream the Next Episode on Friday. We all are Anxious to find out if Lance, who still thinks that it was his own Brother, Clark, who was beehind Alexa's Mysterious Disappearance and who decided to sell his Honey Export Buzziness and move to Bolivia with Alexa's Sister, Mavis, will finally do the Right Thing and turn himself into the Authorities. I’m thinking he probably won’t, but it will give ButterCup, Potato something New to Buzz about over the Weekend.

In the meantime, there are times when I simply hafta get out. For one thing, I have to deliver the next Part of my Feature Story to my Editor at the ‘Bee Times Gazette Journal Record...and Online News’ sometime beefore Yesterday. Or was it two Days ago? Which reminds me - I need to start working on that, don't I?

Quite frankly, if I’m late with that, my Editor just needs to know that I’ve been Highly Occupied lately with having to Deal with the Class Action Lawsuit my Lawyer, S.O.Bee filed for us against Felonie Snark and the Snark Brothers Enterprises.

Just a few days ago, I was called to Testify in the First Preliminary Pre-Trial Exploratory Hearing to determine whether or not the Court will finally Hear our Case. Even though I already filled out all the PaperWork listing all my Assets, Real or Imagined, that Felonie Snark Illegally Obtained from me. I mean seriously now, they already have all that Information. Why the hell do they need me to Repeat myself beefore they finally Decide that I should get all my Stuff back?

I asked S.O.Bee that Question, and he  said, "Funny you would ask, bee. Just today, I received from the Court Clerk an Official Writ of Improbable Exploratory Findings - or a WIEF, for short - which details the Conclusionary Validation of Heard and Reported Conditional Inventories and/or Alleged Intellectual Property Holdings pertaining to the 'GGGG,G.Bee, et al. vs Felonie Snark, Snark Brothers Enterprises, et al.' Complaint which clearly indicates that our Standing in the Case has been Recognised by the Court, and that a Judicial Review which will likely bee in favour of the Plaintiff - that's you - should bee Issued within the next ten Buzziness Days."

“What the hell does that mean?" I asked (I always get Confused when it comes to Legal Terminology, ya’ know.)

"What it means, bee, is that after the Court heard your Preliminary Testimony, and after Felonie Snark refused to show up to Testify, the Court will most certainly bee ruling in favour of the Plaintiff - which, again, is you," he said.

"So when do I get my Stuff back?" I asked him. "When will that Wasp bee Evicted so I can move back into my ShoeBox?"

"I expect the Court to Issue a Ruling within the next few hours. If they Rule in your Favour, which I expect the Court will, and under the Provisions of the Arbitrated Pre-Trial Post-Sentencing Agreement which is beeing Drafted as we Speak, you should bee able to start to Reclaim your Stolen Assets, Real or Imagined, and move back into your ShoeBox," S.O.Bee said.

“When?” I asked him.

“In about Six Days,” he said.

"Six Days? The First Day of the Cold Season is in Six Days. Are you telling me I'll have all my Stuff back and will bee able to move back into my ShoeBox beefore the Cold Season beegins? That's great!" I was so excited.

"Yes, and No," S.O.Bee told me. "Yes, you can probably move back into your ShoeBox beefore the Cold Season arrives, even though the Wasp has until January 1st to Vacate the Premises… but No, you won't bee getting all your Stuff back right away. Felonie and the Snarks have until the end of the Month to return all of your Assets, Real or Imagined, that were Illegally Acquired by Felonie during your Persistent Coma. Any Items they fail to Return to you will bee Compensated with Gift Cards Issued by and Redeemable through Snark Brothers Enterprises. Whatever is left from this Settlement after you pay my Fees will bee yours to Enjoy.”

I told S.O.Bee that I Guessed it was an Okay Deal. I mean, at least I’ll finally bee able to move back into my ShoeBox sometime next week, and Potato and I will bee out of ButterCup’s Place beefore the Cold Season starts - and that’s a Good Thing. It’s just too bad that I'm apparently gonna hafta' Put Up with having a Wasp for a Roommate for while.  



Georgie Starts His New Job...


I just hafta' say that I am Highly Confused about why my Editor has Decided that he wants me to write a Weekly Feature Article for the 'Bee Times Gazette Journal Record…and Online News' about what it was like to bee in a Persistent Coma.

Seriously now. There are so many other, incredibly NewsWorthy Things going on . . . continuing Supply-Chain Problems with several kinds of Pollen (it's still Impossible to get ahold of Rose Pollen), the Over-Consumption of Honey in the Hive by bees who think Obesity is a joke (it isn't), that everybody's having to put up with a small Swarm of bees who thinks it's Highly Funny for Dancer Drones to bee spreading Disinformation by giving fake directions to Flowers in the Far Meadow (it's not), and of course the Worst thing that's going on is the fact that it seems the Hive has a Problem with an old Queen (Queen Jemima, to bee precise) who somehow managed to Escape beeing Murdered after her Replacement took over, and who Mistakenly Thinks she still should bee Queen (she shouldn't bee). Now those are NewsWorthy Topics that should bee Reported On - but does my Editor want me to Investigate and Write about those Stories? No, he does not. He wants me to write about a Persistent Coma that I barely Remember.

Geeeeeeze. If I didn't hafta' have a Job so I can Chip In on the Utility and Grocery Bills while I'm staying at ButterCup's Place,
I'd tell my Editor exactly what he could do with his Assignment.

Unfortunately, I need the Honey, so Fine. I'll Comply.
For now.


It Looks Like Georgie's Life is About to Change...


So after we got finished with dealing with our Lawyer, S.O.Bee, Great Grandma Gee Gee invited us all back to her and Kevin's BootBox for some of her Highly Delicious and Mostly Nutritious Royal HoneyChew Krisp ™ Cookies and some Delightful Chilled Nectar (which was a good thing beecause, as I mentioned beefore, I was Amazingly Hungry).

While we were all sitting around her Kitchen Table, I noticed that ButterCup and Kevin (my Illegitimate Nephew) excused themselves and were standing in the other Room buzzing with each other over what looked like a Very Important Conversation about something Serious. Beefore they came back to the Table to have more Cookies, I saw ButterCup give Kevin a piece of paper, and heard her buzz, "You tell him. I'll wait outside."

"Fine," Kevin said.  ButterCup didn't look at me as she stepped outside. He had a Weird Smile on his Face as he walked back toward me. It didn’t look particularly Genuine, if you know what I Mean.

Kevin sat down next to me at the Table, looked deep into my Compound Eyes, and said, "Uncle Georgie, you're the best Uncle in the World, and I Love you, but... ." There was an Awkward Pause as he stopped talking for a few seconds and started eating a Cookie. 

"But what?" I asked him.

"Well, ButterCup asked me to tell you that you need to find a Job so that you can Contribute to the Grocery and Utility Bills while you're staying at her Place. She just cannot have you Taking Advantage of her Generous and Giving Nature while you're trying to get your ShoeBox and all your Personal Property, Real or Imagined, back from Felonie Snark and the Snark Brothers," he told me.

"A Job?" I asked. "ButterCup thinks I should get a Job? Like what kind of Job?" I asked.

"How the hell should I know?" Kevin said. "Also," he added,  "ButterCup asked me to pass along this Note.  It's addressed to you. It's from your Editor. So here - I suggest you read it."  

Then he gave me the Note. It said:

"Bee: I don't know where the Hell you've been, or if you think that you don't still have Responsibilities here at the Bee Times Gazette Journal Record…and Online News, you've got another Thing coming. I expect to see you in my Office Immediately if not Sooner... and don't bee late - or Else. - Your Editor"

"My Editor wants to see me??"

"Apparently so," Kevin said.

"What do you think he wants?"

"Don't ask me. Contrary to Popular Beelief, I'm not a Mind Reader," Kevin said, "but if I were you, Uncle, I'd make a point of going to his Office Immediately if not Sooner, instead of standing around here, asking a bunch of Questions we can't Answer - or Else. And, if I were you, I'd take off that grungy-looking Green String you’ve been wearing around your Neck . It looks Ridiculous."  (I never knew it was a Popular Beelief that Kevin was a Mind Reader, and I wish I hadn't not known that sooner. Also, I didn’t wanna bee Rude, but Kevin should know by now that Bees don’t have Necks. But whatever.)

"You mean my
By-Prescription-Only Therapeutic Wool Warming Device that Nurse Beeatrice gave me when I was finally Released from the Clinic?" I asked.

"Whatever it's called, you should take that thing Off, and leave it here. I. You should also go without Potato," Kevin said.

"Leave Potato? But what if I need some Certified Emotional Support?" I asked.

"Don't worry. She'll bee fine right here waiting until you get back," Kevin said.

"Fine," I said.

So I did that.

When I got to my Editor's Office, I was pretty sure he was Highly Glad to see me, beecause when I walked in, he said, "Well, well, well, look at who finally decided to show up for Work. Where in the Hell have you been, bee?"

"Maybee you didn't hear that I'm just coming out of a Persistent Coma, and have been Overly Buzzy with some Legal Matters that have required my Immediate Attention. You see, I ... ".

"Let me just stop you there, bee," he stopped me there. "I know all about your Persistent Coma, and I also know that you've been Awake and capable of Working for weeks now."

"Working on what?" I asked him.

"You will bee working on writing a Series of Exclusive Serial Feature Stories in which you will share your Insights as a Recovering Persistent Coma Patient," he said.

“But I didn’t even think I worked here anymore,” I said.

“I don’t know what gave you that Idea, bee. You’re still a very Important Part of our Staff of Editorial Journalists.”

"You're Kidding, right?" I thought he was Kidding. 

"I don't Kid, bee," he said. “And I beelieve our Beeloved Subscribers would very much Appreciate hearing the Intimate Details surrounding your Persistent Coma, and your Alleged Subsequent Recovery.”

"But I don't seem to Remember much about beeing in that Persistent Coma. I mean, I Remember a few things, but everything is kind of Fuzzy, so I don't Think...".

"No, you don't. You don’t Think. What you do is Write the Feature Stories, and your first one is due on my Desk no later than the Close of Buzziness on Monday - or Else," he said. “Now get out of my Office.”

Geeeeze. What could I say? He's my Editor. "Fine," I said.

So there goes my Weekend.


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