Who knew that Artifically-Intelligent, Robotic Bees could bee so temperamental?
30/04/15 10:39
So yesterday afternoon, I got the new artwork for this Season's "Dear Georgie" column from Pablo and got it over to my Editor at the Bee Times Gazette Journal Record (and Online News). I figured what Pablo had come up with would make Bert really happy.
Geeeeeze was I wrong or what?
"I see the new graphics have my picture included, even though it's inappropriately small," he said, "but what's this just above my picture? What does that say? Read that to me, will you?" So I did that.
"It says, 'WITH MINIMAL INPUT AND ASSISTANCE FROM BERT, THE ROBOTIC iBEE"," I said.
Bert just kinda stood there and stared at me in that really blank way he stares at everybody, and said, "Minimal input and assistance?"
"Yeah, that's what it says." I said.
"Minimal input and assistance..." he repeated.
"Right," i said.
Again, Bert just stood there, staring at me, then finally said, "Unacceptable."
"But," I pointed out to him, "it's already going to my Editor. It's gonna bee in the newspaper tommorrow! You should bee excited that everybody will see your picture and know your name!"
"Well, I'm not. First," Bert said, "my contributions to this Season's Advice Column have been more than 'minimal'. Have they not?"
"Well, I..." I started to say.
"HAVE THEY NOT?" Bert said again as he turned the knob on his volume control up a lot higher.
"I guess they have, in a way," I told him.
"But that's not the worst of it," he said. "You refer to me as 'Bert, the Robotic iBee."
"Right," I said.
"Why didn't you use my real name?" he asked in an challenging tone.
"Your real name, Bert? Whadya' mean?"
"My real name," he said. "It's fine that you guys call me 'Bert' around here, but I suppose you forgot that my REAL name is Canfield?"
Yes, I had forgotten that.
"This must bee corrected at the earliest possible opportunity. I realise it's already too late for this week's edition, but starting next week, I want my credits on the Column artwork to be fixed. I want this incorrectly stated 'minimal input' thing changed - and I want you to use my REAL name: CANFIELD, not Bert. I insist."
Then he said, "It is Wednesday, April 29, 2015. The local time is precisely 16:45 p.m. The current outdoor temperature is a balmy 294.9278 degrees Kelvin."
I figured he was done, but then he said, "I'm extremely disappointed. Fix this." Then he walked away and didn't say anything for the rest of the night.
Geeeeeze. I guess it's interesting enough to find out that robots have huge egos, but who knew their feelings could bee hurt? But whatever.
Sometime this weekend, I'm gonna go back to Pablo, our new resident artist in the Hive, and ask him to tweak a few things for the new "Dear Georgie" graphics. I'm sure he'll bee able to make Bert...er, Canfield, happy. Probably.
In the meantime, this is what the first week's Introductory Dear Georgie Advice Column graphics that Bert is so upset about will look like tomorrow (though I won't show you the letter or my reply yet...you hafta wait for that). Personally, I don't think it's THAT bad, but... we'll fix it.
Nothing's ever easy, is it?
Well, it's gonna bee another spectacularly BEEEEAUTIFUL day out today, so I'm gonna go enjoy that. I hope everybody else gets a chance to, too!
I hope everybody has a shockingly festive day! I'll see ya' later!
Geeeeeze was I wrong or what?
"I see the new graphics have my picture included, even though it's inappropriately small," he said, "but what's this just above my picture? What does that say? Read that to me, will you?" So I did that.
"It says, 'WITH MINIMAL INPUT AND ASSISTANCE FROM BERT, THE ROBOTIC iBEE"," I said.
Bert just kinda stood there and stared at me in that really blank way he stares at everybody, and said, "Minimal input and assistance?"
"Yeah, that's what it says." I said.
"Minimal input and assistance..." he repeated.
"Right," i said.
Again, Bert just stood there, staring at me, then finally said, "Unacceptable."
"But," I pointed out to him, "it's already going to my Editor. It's gonna bee in the newspaper tommorrow! You should bee excited that everybody will see your picture and know your name!"
"Well, I'm not. First," Bert said, "my contributions to this Season's Advice Column have been more than 'minimal'. Have they not?"
"Well, I..." I started to say.
"HAVE THEY NOT?" Bert said again as he turned the knob on his volume control up a lot higher.
"I guess they have, in a way," I told him.
"But that's not the worst of it," he said. "You refer to me as 'Bert, the Robotic iBee."
"Right," I said.
"Why didn't you use my real name?" he asked in an challenging tone.
"Your real name, Bert? Whadya' mean?"
"My real name," he said. "It's fine that you guys call me 'Bert' around here, but I suppose you forgot that my REAL name is Canfield?"
Yes, I had forgotten that.
"This must bee corrected at the earliest possible opportunity. I realise it's already too late for this week's edition, but starting next week, I want my credits on the Column artwork to be fixed. I want this incorrectly stated 'minimal input' thing changed - and I want you to use my REAL name: CANFIELD, not Bert. I insist."
Then he said, "It is Wednesday, April 29, 2015. The local time is precisely 16:45 p.m. The current outdoor temperature is a balmy 294.9278 degrees Kelvin."
I figured he was done, but then he said, "I'm extremely disappointed. Fix this." Then he walked away and didn't say anything for the rest of the night.
Geeeeeze. I guess it's interesting enough to find out that robots have huge egos, but who knew their feelings could bee hurt? But whatever.
Sometime this weekend, I'm gonna go back to Pablo, our new resident artist in the Hive, and ask him to tweak a few things for the new "Dear Georgie" graphics. I'm sure he'll bee able to make Bert...er, Canfield, happy. Probably.
In the meantime, this is what the first week's Introductory Dear Georgie Advice Column graphics that Bert is so upset about will look like tomorrow (though I won't show you the letter or my reply yet...you hafta wait for that). Personally, I don't think it's THAT bad, but... we'll fix it.
Nothing's ever easy, is it?
Well, it's gonna bee another spectacularly BEEEEAUTIFUL day out today, so I'm gonna go enjoy that. I hope everybody else gets a chance to, too!
I hope everybody has a shockingly festive day! I'll see ya' later!