Zambeezi has a Mishap, and it's Friday...time for the bees to Rehearse...

Friday, September 16, 2016

So I was informed by Rudy Bee yesterday afternoon that I hafta go out and buy a whole bunch of Pre-Made Non-GMO Natural Organic Not-From-Concentrate Nectar for tonight’s Bee Kazzzzoo Band Rehearsal. “And bee thure ith Thirtified Tokthin-Free,” he told me.

Geeeeeeeeze. Just beecause I was legally prohibited from making another batch of Georgio’s Vintage Nectaral Fermentito™, which I’m sure would have been perfect this time, I hafta go out and spend a bunch of honey on a bunch of Nectar that has the Better Hivekeeping Seal of Approval. Next time I promise to provide all the Refreshments for the Bee Kazzzzoo Band & Orchestra Rehearsals, I’m gonna bee more specific.

Anyway, that’s what I’m gonna do today.

In the meantime, if anybody knows anybody who might have a 0.000375-Ton Truck I could borrow, that would help.

By the way, I was really hoping that Zambeezi (the World Famous Beesker and All-Around Beeloved Entertainer) would bee able to join our Kazzzzoo Band & Orchestra - as an “Orchestra” part of the whole thing. Sadly, I just heard he accidentally got his Right Antennae stuck in an Electric Drill a day or so ago, so he’s in his Swarm’s Hive Clinic (he lives in Kansas, ya’ know), trying to get that all unraveled. (I’ll bet that hurt. A lot.)

Zambeezi_AntennaMishap


They say that, even if they can save the Antenna, he’s gonna bee in Sensory Restoration Therapy until at least January, and that his Antennae may never straighten out completely. That’s highly unfortunate.

In case you happen to have Antennae, it’s always a good thing to remember to not get too close to drills when they’re spinning. Ya’ don’t wanna get your Antenna stuck in a spinning drill, ya’ know. (That hurts. A lot.)

So we’re all hoping the best for him. I was gonna send him a Get Better Fast Card, but I can’t find my stamps.

Okay then, I hope everybody has a spectacularly festive weekend!

I’ll see ya’ on Monday!

Welcome to Georgie's last Weekly Feature Thingy of the Hot Season...

Tips,-Ties,-and-Tittle-Tattle_10(final-edition)

An exciting Rest-of-the-Week lies ahead for Georgie...

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

I hope everybody managed to survive Animal Hostility Day yesterday. AHD always makes me so nervous, ya’ know?

Well, as anybody who’s been paying attention knows, the rest of this week is gonna bee exciting, mostly!

First, the Real (and not the Rip-Off Human version) Bee Kazzzzoo Band & Orchestra will bee rehearsing this Friday. From what I’ve heard, everybody is gonna bee there. Except maybee Great Grandma Gee Gee. She says her knees hurt, so she’s gonna stay home and bake Cookies.

Rudy informed us that Lester is out of Intensive Care, and that he’ll most definitely bee there. And that even though the Feud that’s been going on beetween Ultra Violet and Violet LeBlanc about who should bee Musical Director is still going on (I heard somebody recently threw something at somebody else during an argument or something, but that just might bee a rumour), they’re both gonna bee there. Rudy’s gonna put Kevin and Bert beetween them so nobody gets hurt. And Fleur de Bee will also bee there, (she’s still here, but nobody knows why). Fleur can bee so mysterious sometimes, ya’ know?

But that’s not all that’s happening this week. Oh no. This week is the last full week of the Hot Season, and next week, the Cool Season Officially beegins! And just when ya’ think things could not possibly get more exciting, my final, last-of-the-Hot-Season Weekly Feature Thingy, “Tips, Ties, and Tittle Tattle”, appears in tomorrow’s Bee Time Gazette Journal Record…and Online News! After that, I’m taking the rest of the Hot Season off. (My Editor says I earned it, mostly.)

Tips,Ties,TittleTattle_FINAL-EDITION


Okay then. It’s highly chilly out today, so I’m gonna go practise or something. Or maybee I’ll go turn on BeeFlix and find out if they have the Concluding Episodes of this year’s Talent Contest. I never did find out who won that. (Maybee nobody did, which is why I haven’t heard anything.)

I hope everybody has a massively ingenious day!

I’ll see ya’ later!

Bert's feelings are hurt...

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

So I finally remembered what it was that I was gonna tell you yesterday. I can’t beelieve I forgot what it was until just now.

I think it was Saturday, probably, when I was walking through the Living Room. Just beefore I tripped over the edge of that new Berber Carpet we had planned to install next week, I spotted Bert. You remember Bert, right? He’s my Illegitimate Nephew’s (Kevin’s) iBee. (Kevin’s iBee, the robot, remember? Tall guy. Made out of a bunch of different things and parts? Right, Bert.)

Well, Bert was sitting in a corner, hiding his face, and was making this kinda squeaking sound.

Bert'sFeelings-are-Hurt_


I saw that Kevin (my Illegitimate Nephew), was buzzing around the Kitchen, munching on a Honey Sandwich (without a napkin), so I asked him, “What’s up with Bert?”

Kevin took a bite of his Sandwich, kinda chewed for a minute, then said, “You don’t know? Seriously? You’re the best uncle in the world, Uncle Georgie, and I love you, but sometimes, you can bee incredibly insensitive.”

“WHAT??” I didn’t know why he was calling me “insensitive”. If you prick me, do I not bleed, probably?
(Yes, I do, in case you’re still sitting there wondering about that. Geeeeeze.)

Then Kevin plunked down next to me and asked me, “Remember the other day when you told everybody that even Humans could bee in the Bee Kazzzzoo Band & Orchestra?”

“Yeah,” I think I remembered.

“And do you remember when we were sitting around here, with the Final List of Permanent Members of the Bee Kazzzzoo Band & Orchestra, and Bert was listening in?”

“Yeah,” though I didn’t know Bert was eavesdropping.

“Well, after Bert had heard about who was invited to bee a Permanent Member of the Band, and heard that even Human BeePs could join their own version of this project of yours, he said, ‘Fine. Everybody in the whole world can join the Band, but I guess not ME. Not me, who is Just a Robot.’,” Kevin said. “That’s what he said, uncle: ‘Just a Robot’. What do you have to say to that?”

“That he’s just a Robot?” I thought he was, probably, since he’s just a Robot.

Then Kevin gave me this kinda dirty look and said, “Bert is more than Just a Robot, uncle. I’m deeply surprised you haven’t figured that out by now. Do you think he LIKES giving the Time, Date and Local Outdoor Temperature Readings all the time? No, he does not. He does it beecause he CARES. Bert has feelings. He has Deep Feelings, in fact, and it is quite obvious those feelings were highly hurt, so for the past few days, he’s been sitting in the corner, crying, beecause nobody asked him to bee in the Kazoo Band & Orchestra,” Kevin said. “That’s so thoughtless.”

“Crying? Is that what that squeaking sound is?” I had to ask.

“Indeed, Uncle Georgie,” Kevin said, looking at me as if I didn’t know robots could cry. “Bert was crying. His little Mechanical Heart has been broken, beecause nobody thought to include him.”

“Well, I…” I started to say I’d bee happy to invite Bert to join the Kazzzzoo Band & Orchestra, but Kevin interrupted me.

“And I suppose you didn’t know that robots can cry,” he said.

I didn’t know that, so I said, “I did not know that.”

After Kevin finished going on and on about the mechanical and Inner-Electronical and Pseudo-Integrated Relative Spacial-Plane Physics beehind his soon-to-bee Patented iBee Emotion Chip, and explaining all the Key Commands involved in the Necessary Over-Sensitivity Software Modules he employed in building Bert, he asked me, “So? What are you gonna do about all this?”

Of course, I immediately told him that I was gonna invite Bert to bee in the Kazzzzoo Band and Orchestra. I just can’t handle crying, ya’ know? Especially from a Robot. It’s just weird.

So I did that. I went over to Bert where he was still going through the Sobbing Script Kevin had written for him, and told him he could join the Bee Kazzzzoo Band & Orchestra

I guess that made him happy, beecause he stopped making that highly annoying squeaking sound, stood up, turned around and said, “Thank you. I deeply appreciate your Kind Invitation. It is Saturday, September 10, 2016. The current time is 08 hundred hours, 37 minutes and 16 seconds. The outdoor temperature is a balmy 290.0944 Degrees Kelvin. Have a nice day.”

Then he went into the other room, all happy and humming on a Kazzzzoo he pulled out of his Butt Compartment.

Problem solved. Now all he needs is the Sheet Music.

Anyway, for the next few days, I hafta teach Bert all the songs we know, and make sure he gets an Official Uniform Beret and Kazzzzoo.

So I’m gonna go do that.

I hope everybody has an amazingly vivacious day!

I’ll see ya’ later!

PS: Everybody needs to remember that today is Animal Hostility Day! Let’s all bee careful out there and for sure, watch your back.

Once again, Georgie finds himself in his Editor's Office...

Monday, September 12, 2016

It’s Monday! At last! That means everybody has just one, more day to prepare for Animal Hostility Day, which is tomorrow. (That’s always such a special day, ya’ know.)

So, I had planned to take it easy today, but something happened over the weekend that kinda needs my Immediate Attention. And that’s in addition to the fact that I had to go see my Editor First Thing This Morning.

Georgie-with-his-Editor_4


“When I walked in, he said, “And?”
I said, “And what?”
“And? Where is the AND?” He seemed highly curious about this “and” thing.

“Uh, and … uh…” I just couldn’t come up with anything.

“In your Feature Article this week, you left out the word, ‘AND’, Bee. Never mind that you misspelled ‘beeginning’, as in “beeginning to recover”. Leaving an ‘E’ out of a word is halfway understandable but completely leaving words out of your sentences is both Unprofessional and Unacceptable,” he said.

“I did that?” (I didn’t remember doing that.)

“Yes, you did. There was no “and” between the words ‘colours’ and ‘styles’. You left out the “and”. ‘…colours AND styles’ is what it should have read. But it didn’t. I just won’t have it.”

He seemed marginally upset about this whole “and” thing, so I said, “Sorry, it won’t happen again, beecause if I’m anything, I’m dependable trustworthy,” I told him.

“Dependable AND trustworthy, Bee,” He said.

“THANK YOU!” I felt so flattered by his praise.

He just looked at me and told me to get out of his Office.

So I did that.

I know there was something else I was gonna tell everybody, but I can’t remember what it is at the moment. I’m sure I’ll remember what it was by tomorrow, probably.

In the meantime, the Humans Who Think They Can Predict the Future are saying it’s gonna bee a beeautiful day, so I’m gonna go out and enjoy it!

I hope has an exquisitely tremendous day!

I’ll see ya’ later!